till death do us part... in sickness and in health

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Do you recall, standing at the altar, saying your vows? This was one of the long line of promises we all made. Health covers all kinds of health areas, physical, emotional and mental health. Many of us, will be there with a bowl if hot soup for our spouses, when they are ill. But how many of us realize that they have other health needs too.

Parents who have a child with special needs will tell you that one way or another they are aware of this. Dealing with either mental and emotional health, can be very exhausting too. And the recovery may take years.(no bowl of good soup is going to help you feel better, may be some wine may help relax you)

However, one good lifestyle habit that I have noticed common amongst parents with children of special needs, is that they never break down together. It seems to be a universal understanding, that the family unit cannot function such. Thus, each spouse takes turn to grieve. Peter and I did that too. We still do it, it actually helps keep the marriage in tact, when the communication line have gone dead.

Normally, the emotionally stronger individual will hold on and allow the other to breakdown first. I lean on Peter, always. But when autism came visiting, Peter was not willing to accommodate. He was very isolated and withdrawn. I waited for a year for Peter to stomach the fact, that our precious little boy had autism. After the long wait, when Peter was active and on board, then I took some time to breakdown. And it was bad. So bad.